“In a society preoccupied with how best to raise a child, I’m finding I need to mesh what’s best for my child with what is necessary for a balanced mother. I am recognizing that ceaseless giving translates into giving yourself away. And, when you give yourself away, you are not a healthy mother, and you are not a healthy self.

So, now I’m learning to be a woman first and a mother second. I am learning to just experience my emotions without robbing my children of their individual dignity by feeling their emotions too. I am learning that a healthy child will have his own set of emotions and characteristics that are his alone. And, very different from mine.

I am learning the importance of honest exchanges and feelings because pretenses don’t fool children. They know their mother better than she knows herself.

I am learning that no one overcame her past unless she confronts it. Otherwise, her children will absorb exactly what she’s attempting to over come.

I am learning that words of wisdom fall on deaf ears if my actions contradict my deeds. Children tend to be better impersonators than listeners.

I am learning that life is meant to be filled with as much sadness and pain as happiness and pleasure. And allowing ourselves to feel everything life has to offer is an indicator of fulfillment. I am learning that fulfillment cannot be attained through giving myself away. But, through giving to myself and sharing with others, I am learning that the best way to teach my children to live a fulfilling life is not by sacrificing my life. It is through living a fulfilling life myself.

I am trying to teach my children that I have a lot to learn. Because I am learning that letting go of them is the best way of holding on.”

The above poem is titled “Mothering Myself”. I believe this poem is by Marianne Williamson and it is one of my favorites. When I share it in my yoga classes on Kauai, I often have mamas ask if I can email them the poem too.

I did not ask my daughter to get into this pose. She said, “look mama, this is what you did with your students today.” And she joyfully dropped into the surrender of this space.

May all of us find yummy peace today.

Legs Up The Wall Yoga Pose

Sanskrit Name:

• Vapirita Karani

Yoga Pose Benefits:

• relieves tension in the legs and feet,
• relieves menstrual cramps,
• calms the mind.

Alignment Tip: 

• The longer you stay in the pose the better and you can work up to 20 minutes if needed. This should not necessarily stretch your hamstrings, so if you are feeling tight in the back of your legs in this pose, bring your booty farther away from the wall. The idea is to really surrender and let go.
• To come out of the pose, roll onto your side, and stay resting on your side for about half as long as you had your legs up the wall to neutralize your blood pressure before coming back upright.